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Choking game - How to.... A Definitive Guide for all kids.

The choking Game
Hi Kids, have you ever tried the choking game? It is neat and sweeping the nation. All you have to do is take some deep breaths and then cut off your air supply. It is so much FUN and will either thrill you or put you on an autopsy table.
So here's the how to:

1st - Take several deep breaths in and out (10-15 is recommended) and then have a friend strangle you. See picture.
2nd - Enjoy the ride... You will either experience a great euphoria or a horrible but euphoric death... Either way, you win!
3rd - Hide the corpse of the friend you just killed. Find a location at least 2 miles from your house. I know an eighty pound kid is hard to carry to consider making the pieces smaller by using a hacksaw that can easily be obtained from you father or step-father's toolbox. After the corpse has been sliced into pieces, take it as far away from the scene as possible. It is also a good idea to chop your friend up in a remote location. If you need to
borrow
your parents car feel free. Make sure to wrap the body tightly as not to leave forensic evidence behind. If you have a deep lake or an ocean nearby all the better!
4th - Create an alibi, make sure your friends can vouch for you presence during the time of the accident. Come to your friend's house as close to the incident as you can and convince them you were stuck in traffic. DO NOT tell anyone about your choking game mishap.
5th - LIE to police
This second part is for parents if you find your child unconscious. Here is what to do.
If you actually are in love with your little brat follow this diagram. If you don't, pick them up off of the floor and choke them some more, just to make sure they are out of the picture.
If for some unknown reason you wish to resuscitate your child, please your hands (in a fist) into their sternum and pull hard enough to help but not hard enough to crack their ribs shattering rib fragments into their supple lung tissue.
The Choking Game is an institution. One that should be carried on for decades by our children and our children's children's. I hope I have provided enough information to make your next choking game a fun and entertaining experience.

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Zayne Alexander on :

Wow, encouraging children to play this game and hide the corpse of their best friends I strongly encouge this be taken off the internet!!! This is a very dangerous game and it's scary for parents and children alike!

Someone on :

This is just a joke. Didn't you see that only 1/6 from this page is about how to play this game? The other part is some creepy stuff written to make you not do this. Anyway yes I agree with you this thing has killed thousands of kids all around the world.

Girl on :

Totally keep it up!!! Its actually amusing, even if i would never try it... (: I like this site!

megan on :

Wow i agree,this should so be taken off the internet.People are trying to get less people to do this. Verry verry bad i learned this in school today v_v VERRY DISAPOINTING!!

kayla on :

you idiot take this off the internet some kids don't understand sarcasm !! what if they actually do this "game " with their Best friend ! not only are they going to lie to the authority they are also going to lie to the parents of their best friend !!!!!

jessica on :

i am the mom of aubrey and isac 2 15 year olds that killed them selves playing the choking game i think it is a very bad idea the person who put this up is sick in the head and needs help people suffer everyday with the loss of a child due to the choking game i think this to should be taken off the internet i am trill suffering a loss and if the choking game was never created i would still have 2 beautifal children.

Leslee on :

I lost my 15 year old son in 05 to this sick not a game!! 10 years ago and I feel like it was yesterday! I found him dead in his room I don't know how to get though this

Deb on :

You idiot! You needed to put up more photos in the tutorial. How the hell are the kiddies going to know what kind of saw to use?

Hannah on :

I dont know if you were joking but people may take this seriously! ...

xoon on :

this is absolute stupid. seriously you need to delete this. i was googling picts on how to help choked kids and this stupid site i found. think another positive creative way how you wanna state your share.

Anonymous on :

i can't believe that somone would actullay put up on a website on how to play this stupid dumb-ass game! wtf anyone would do such a thing is way beyond me! i have a friend who tried this a long time ago and killed himself from it...i'm still mourning his death to this very day! i don't give a rat's ass that this is only a joke. i feel strongly that it should be removed from the internet PERMANTLY!

Anonymous on :

Dumb
Asses

Anonymous on :

Not sure what nationality the commenterrs are but I'm assuming American. So...Ever heard of freedom of speech? gtfo sensitive people lol. If you're a decent parent like you think, then you won't let your little snowflakes roam free on the internet anyway. Problem solved.

wtf on :

You stupid ass i dont care if this is a joke or not my son died trying this game and it has totally destroyed my family and myself... Im in the UK and its idiots like you posting dangerous games on the web that get our kids killed. Im a responsible mother and monitored my sons internet activity he learned the stupid game from school. Remove this crap...Do you want to be responsible for another child dying this way?? What if it was one of your family members??

Aubrey Monserrate on :

Although people do have the freedom of speech, information that causes bodily to children and teenagers does not need to be featured online as a for of entertainment. As well as the writer of this article having a very casual and up beat attitude. The "choking game" is killing teenagers everyday and needs to be stopped not encouraged. Even if this article is not taken down, it needs to be avoided and reported because it is giving the wrong idea to anyone between the age of ten and nineteen. The "choking game" is causing more harm than it seems and the matter is not being taken care of if we spend time yelling at everyone who has their own opinion. Though I do not recommend this information being on the internet, it will never go away. Information like this is also helpful to adults and parents. They can find signs of the "choking game" in their children by what they have read here. Don't be so quick to judge before you think about the whole helpful and non-helpful information.

Anon on :

I'm personally a fan of this game I play it all the time it make me feel better much!! Relieves stress.. I love this game. I'm also 13 been doing it since I was 10 I'm not dead?

American Al on :

At first, I thought, "What, is this guy seriously telling kids how to play this so-called game?" Then, I realized he wrote it as a scare tactic, to make kids NOT want to play this 'game' best left to sons if terrorists. As for the idiot, telling parents that they're not decent, if they don't keep their children from finding sites like this: Are you a complete moron? And remember, I'm American, so in your own words, I have Freedom of Speech. Kids can find their way past internet safeguards easier than I can see past your false bravado. And fyi, Mister Man, this page isn't flagged for it's content. But, you're right. A decent parent would know the content of each and every site their teenage kid visits on the net. I sure as hell know that my own 16 yr old, rebellious son would have no problem with me standing over his shoulder while he's surfing even 'safe' sites like this one. That's American Sarcasm, dick.

Nichole. on :

You need to. Take this down I hade a buddy who die from the. Choke. Gane it not cool teach how to do it I just saw. A big kid choke a lil kid out how. Could he do it. Take. It down. It was on youtube

Anonymous on :

How funny,,,,, This is Sarcastic so the world knows if you have a sense of humor and common sense than you know this is not to be taken seriously at all.. it would just prove to be a reminder that the game is very dangerous and don't ever even consider it but the objective is to inform people that THERE IS NO CURE FOR DEATH AND MOST IDIOTS

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