Please God No

A tearful Sean Nienow admitted in an interview on Saturday that he might have "majorly fucked up" when it came to his business dealings and his post $600,000 loan from the government several years ago.

"I blew it", admitted Nienow, "I never thought they'd want their money back so badly".

"Apparently, they want to target a high-profile public official that is a month or two behind on payments", said the politician who is more than 30 months behind in his repayment to the Federal Government.

"Do you know what?? Fuck you guys! The fact that I stole all of this money from the government and have ignored their repeated attempts to settle have nothing to do with the fact that I am a Conservative politically-minded adult with a focus on self-responsibility and fiscal conservation".